"To care or not to care"

February 12, 2017

Care comes in all shapes and sizes.



I am 17 years of age and as of August - a newly type one diabetic. Despite its perks (which I'm yet to find) many have asked ‘politely’ for me to re-evaluate my life. They claim, ‘I must take extra special care of myself’ in always wearing slippers or always putting used needles and lancets in a Sharp box - instead, of being lazy and chucking them to the side.


I just want to make this clear from the start - I LOVE my family and believe they have been nothing but supportive and considerate every step of the way. I couldn't imagine where I would be without them, yet, as you've guessed it, there's always a...


... BUT - they sure can be hypocrites at the best of time. They haven't had to change one bit, most of them are still drinking and smoking and even a few pop up to the bakery when no one's watching. And they still criticize! Honestly, where do they find the time? Where is it in their busy itinerary to 'harass' and 'criticize' their only 'type one diabetic'?


One perk I have found is the 'VIP service' the NHS provide after being diagnosed with a 'chronic' condition. In being part of their 'Gold package' I regularly sit down with one of their experts and discuss how I am doing. Half the time, I don't want to go! Why on earth would I want a nurse to point out my faults? This will only encourage my family to follow in example! 


Besides - I haven't got the best control! I tell my family all the time, "I'm not Superman", after all, wasn't Superman's weakness, kryptonite? All I'm saying is everyone has their faults, so when you point your 'judgmental' finger at someone, you should first point that finger at yourself. 


On top of all that - who said type one diabetes was easy? When I feel the symptoms of a hypo, I have the littlest of control - other than jelly babies and a swig of lucozade. I might as well be wrestling with a 420 pound African lion or a house cat named 'Fluffy'. They're both gonna' pack a punch and scram the sh*t out of you, until you feed them with sugar. It's just a matter of time before THEY'RE BACK


So, yes, I wasn't expecting a 'well done' from the nurse, but a slap on the back doesn't go a miss!


But. And there's that 'but' again. She said I was doing a great job and to keep it up! I felt a wave of confidence brush over my head. I am managing better and am much calmer than ever before. I guess it was a nice feeling being told 'I was doing it right' - that seemed to do the trick!


Yet - I still value the two sides of a coin. I accept my family's growing concern whilst challenge it all the same time. I argue 'Is it not enough, I must take insulin now?' as well as hug and laugh it all off after a stressful day. I guess what I'm trying to say is...IT'S HARD!  Can't I be two things at once? At the end of the day, how can anyone argue at someone, just for caring?

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